Who cares?!?!

There once was a girl named Patty,

who became a big ol' fatty.

Her weight was so bad,

she started to look like a lad...

God damn that dumb Dyke Patty...

-The End

I love this one...

1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job.

2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man you can count on! And doesn't lie to you.

4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.

5. It is important that these four men don't know each other.


Foot Note:

One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob:
'If we don't get some support soon, people will think we're nuts.'

FBA Logo

E-Merging News!

Feel lucky that you are the first to know the news of the newest hot couple, Patty and Vin Diesel! Patty and Vin met at the Gold's gym, and rumor has it they are now a couple. Patty has a hard time dealing with the media and photos, but they still find time to workout together several times a day and have been caught together in the following photos.

We'd like to wish the couple the best of luck in their exercise ventures together, and a very happy future together!

February...

So, where did everyone go?  We were doing so well... Patty got sick - people got busy - and the fitness minutes just collapsed.  Come on everyone, get back up on the horse.  I want a shiny calendar... I want the stars to gleam from the page!!  I don't want to see the FBA Go MIA... So, come on everyone!  Get some Dang Stars on the Charts!!

Don't Fall off the Wagon!!

I know that it has been just over 5 weeks for out little group.  Our star chart is starting to grow dim... but now is NOT the time to fall off the wagon ladies.  

Make sure that you are drinking all of your water, that you are getting to the gym whenever possible, and that you are maintaining those portion controls that you have set for yourself.

We are all doing a great job so Keep up the good work!

((Taps Microphone))

Tap

Tap

Tapperooni

Anyone out there??

CRAP!!

(Leaps from moving wagon)

Tale of the Tortoise and the Hare

Shape

Shape[sheyp]- noun, verb, shaped, shaping.
the quality of a distinct object or body in having an external surface or outline of specific form or figure.

(Thank you Dictionary.com)

So, it happened yesterday. I noticed it out of the corner of my eye. Shape? No.
I have an excellent imagination. So, I put on my (not form fitting at all) orange T-shirt and went on with my workout. I thought about it a couple times last night, but I didn't want to find out the image in the corner of my eye was wrong. Besides, the scale says that nothing has changed.

But then it happened again. This morning. As I was putting on my non form fitting green top, because you have to look nice on Hair Zappy Day (Oh you all know what I am talking about so I will SO not explain further on this one),  I walked past the mirror again. What was this?!?!? SHAPE??? CURVES?!?!? DEFINITION?!?!!  WHAT?!?!?

Okay, so I've always had a shape (if you consider blob a shape), but having curves start to show up on my arms, gaining definition, well - that's PRETTY Dang Exciting!!

I'm psyched. Like totally OMG Legally Blond psyched!

Take that you stupid scale. You may not have moved at all, but I'm getting SHAPE! I don't care what you say! I saw it myself. Okay, okay, I'll admit, I have a REALLY good imagination but whatever, I'll go on with my disillusionment if I have to. I have SHAPE!!!

Ok, now back to work for me...


Moral of the story- The scale doesn't always tell the truth (and something about a tortoise and a hare, but I'll get back to you on that one).